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Jokes

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"



Funny Jokes

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Quote of the Day

it is no use walking anywhere to preach unless our walking is our preaching.
The cloud is hew sun light day is nice.
The night bid another happy day.
when cloud is sweep the sun.


"Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I am permitted to hold for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations."

Quote of the Day

Birthday Quotes

Many many happy returns of the day.

Some like sunday some like monday, but i like your birthday.happy birthday my sweetheart.
Tere birth day ko mai tuze kya du wish you happy return of the day
Its another day 4 u. god picked another petals on your flower, wishing your flowers may bloom for year,
How do you expect me to remember your birthday, when you never look any older? happy birthday!

Birthday Quotes

Jellycat

I think jelly cat is one of the nice cat, who looks very smart and beautiful.I ream bear this cat is very rein and catch a good route.This cat habit is very good like he isn't envious to look each other and see other food.It is also helpful and special looks and habit to compare to other cat.



Jellycat

NETWORK OS Most of the network os works under the principle of client-server mechanism. Client –server is a mechanism. In which co-operation and intercommunation between various elements of network takes place and one machine service others for various functions. In a network OS , the users are aware of the existence of multiple computers and can the functionally of the remote server machines. In other words, a user doesn’t have to sit in front of machine in which he wants to work on the job of the system software is to manage the operation of computer as a whole .Where as the application program server the purpose of general useormfor application software of computer system .In other words, system software provides the peat

Distributed OS

DISTRIBUTED OS

A DISRIBUTED Os is one   that appears toots user as a traditionally unit-processor system , even though it is actually composed of multiple processors/COMPUTERS. The user mustn’t be aware of the where there application /program is running or where there file is located. The user feels like he is working in the terminal in front of hi m , but actually the work may take place in any machine in the network .IT is the job of operating system to create such transparency

                 Some trusty distributed systems have dozens of servers around the globe. If traffic is high is any server the job is transferred to other server known as load balancing. The user is unaware of these internal phenomenons in the distributed system and he feels everything is happening in his own computer. In other words, Distributed system is one more enhancement in Networks operating system, adding load balancing

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